What's the thing that makes a man trembling while in the same time, his feet is on solid ground?
I'm starting to believe in destiny. I'm starting to believe that some people were never meant to be happy in life. Maybe there's a strict, heavenly made, totally fucked up masterplan which divides people in two categories. The happy ones... and the lonely ones. Then again, it doesnt have to do anything with the masterplan. Maybe its a curse. A very persistent one. The kind that plays you for a fool. The kind that gives you some kinda hope in the beginning and runs over you at the end.
I'm so fed up with this shit. I mean, c'mon, why can't somebody like me get a break? Am i paying for something? How bad did i fucked up in a previous life to deserve this? Cause sure as hell i didn't fucked up anything in this one.
But even so. History repeats itself. After many years of searching (and when i say many, i mean many) i thought i found my other half. Well, i was wrong. Again. Maybe i was meant to be solo. Maybe it's something higher than me. Something i cannot understand. Even so. It's wrong.
... but then again, i actually did managed to survive all those years in the state of loneliness. I even remember, she was a friend of mine. A very good one. We had a shitload of good times together. Maybe I'll walk up to her, explain her what happened and maybe, just maybe, she'll forgive me by making things like they used to be. Like when i was the center of my universe having total control over my self.
Right now, i miss those times. Cause my universe was rock solid. And right now... i feel I'm trembling...
The thing that makes a man tremble while he's on solid ground, is his soul...